Cecily Paterson

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How to speak positively to your children

Here's a post from several years back - just because I still need to remind myself to do these things.


I'm being challenged by the book Easy to Love, Difficult to Discipline by Becky Bailey so I want to share my findings. 

A 1997 study found that on average a child heard 432 negative comments daily, compared with 32 positive ones.

Becky Bailey* says that the way we speak to ourselves will be the way we speak to our children. Do we focus on our strengths or our weaknesses? Do we think about what we are doing, or what we should bedoing? Do we accept ourselves or always want to change something?

"If you routinely discourage yourself, you will unconsciously discourage your children," says Bailey.

An encouraging home has neurological benefits for children's developing brains. But discouraging homes shape brains that are prone to depression, violents, addictions and impulsivity.

We need to be more encouraging and praising of our children. And ourselves. We need to use more positive language in general.

But... watch out. All praise and encouragement is not created equal. More about that tomorrow!

*in Easy to Love, Difficult to Discipline