Thinking. More emotional stuff

 

Who would have thought I'd have such an emotional reaction to the fact that my daughter turns 11 today? (I mean, apart from the hormones and everything following having a baby?)

The thing is, the year I turned 11, life changed in a big way for me. I left our family home, went off to boarding school a thousand miles away, had mum and dad move to a different location and had to learn to deal with relationship problems and little girl bullying that I'd never experienced before in my life.

In lots of ways, the year in which I turned 11 was the hardest year of my life. It was certainly one of the most defining years of my life.

So to see my little girl hit the same milestone brings back lots of memories - not all of them good ones - and with the memories, a lot of feelings that I didn't think were as strong any more.

While I don't want her life to be magically easy so that she never matures or learns serious things, I do hope and pray that this year is NOT the hardest year of her life. I love the way she is growing up, and I hope that my tears won't be her tears this year.